Blaine van der Griend
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WWE Fastlane predictions

3/4/2017

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It took us a while to get here, but we've finally reached the last stop on the road to WrestleMania. Quite frankly, I think there were way too many stops along the way, mostly due to the double pay per views every other month, but regardless, we should have a clearer outline of the WrestleMania card by the end of this show.

I find that the Raw pay per views are generally a lot better than the Smackdown ones, mostly because it's a much bigger roster, and the top matches heading into 'Mania are from the Raw brand. 

Having said all that, here are my predictions from start to finish...

Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson vs. Enzo Amore and Big Cass for the Raw Tag Team Championships
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I would not be the least bit surprised if this match gets bumped to the kick-off show at the last minute. I think the tag titles have really become irrelevant since they were taken off The New Day. Nothing against Cesaro and Sheamus, but I think The New Day should have been champions heading into 'Mania, which is where they should have lost the belts to Enzo and Cass. We've just seen this match so many times over the last few months that I find myself caring less and less about it each time I see it. Not to say that it won't be a good match, but I think Enzo and Cass should be much higher up the card at this point, and despite their success in Japan, I have not been too impressed by Gallows and Anderson, although that's mainly due to the booking. I would have preferred that they did the big title change at 'Mania, but since the Raw tag belts will probably be on the kick-off show if on the card at all, I think here is where we flip the belts. Enzo and Cass win a hard-fought contest with the Bada-boom-shaka-laka (they have to come up with a new name for this). 

[After the match, Byron Saxton gets out of his seat and interviews Enzo and Cass at the top of the stage]

Saxton: Gentlemen, congratulations on finally winning the Raw Tag Team Titles! How do you feel?

Enzo: How do we feel, Saxton? It was a sour cup'a'haters, but it was a smooth and sweet finish, how you doin'? You haven't truly made it in this business unless you've won championship gold, and we always like to follow the golden rule: He who has the gold makes the rules! Bada-boom, realest guys in the room! How you doin'? We are headin' into 'Mania as the tag team champions of the world! So if you wanna know how we're doin', we're doin' as great as great could be!

Cass: And we ain't duckin' no challengers. Anybody within the sound of our voices who wants some can come get some. 'Cause there's only ONE WORD TO DESCRIBE YOU! AND I'M GONNA SPELL IT OUT FOR YA! S-A-W-F-T! SAWFT!!!

[A promo airs for WrestleMania]

Sasha Banks vs. Nia Jax
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I've generally enjoyed how Nia Jax has been booked lately. She's basically like a female Braun Strowman, and I think it was a good move to have her beat both Sasha and Bayley in recent weeks, and I don't think it hurts either of them. However, Nia's ring hasn't really improved, and Sasha is going to have her work cut out for her here. Hopefully they keep this one short. The goal here should be to keep both of these girls strong, as they are both in the title match at 'Mania. Nia dominates the majority of the match, but makes a mistake on the floor, as she charges at Sasha, who avoids her, and Nia goes crashing into the ring steps, which leads to a count-out victory for Sasha. 

[After the match, Nia snaps and starts attacking the officials]

[We go to the pay per view panel up next, and they are joined by The New Day, who help promote their appearance at WrestleMania, and try to get a petition going to bring in some ice cream bars (I think we'll finally get these at 'Mania)]

[As Neville makes his way to the ring for the next match, Austin Aries stops him at the top of the stage to get an interview. Neville aggressively rips the microphone out of Aries' hand, before Aries can get a word in.]

Neville: In case you haven't noticed, Aries, I've got a match to win. So I don't need some has-been trying to mess up my game plan with your biased interview questions and shady opinions. So why don't you go back behind your little desk, and leave the wrestling to the real men.

[Aries rips the microphone out of Neville's hand]

Aries: Biased, Neville? Is that what you said? Well since you don't like opinions, let me lay down some facts for you. I'm twice as good behind that desk as you are in the ring. And the only reason you have the title is because I have yet to challenge you for it. The fact is, Neville, that you're not on the level that you think you are, you're certainly not on A-double level. Hell, you're not even on the level below me.

[Neville looks like he's about to respond, but instead sucker punches Aries, and does a number on him. The officials help take Aries to the back, as Neville continues to the ring.

Neville vs. Jack Gallagher for the Cruiserweight Championship
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The cruiserweights are always great to watch, as they all put on fantastic matches. The problem is that not all of them are great talkers, which is why I think the division as a whole hasn't connected yet with the fans. While I prefer Neville as a heel, Gallagher is one of the most popular superstars in this division, mainly because he owns his character, and his mic skills are just as impressive as his ring ability. I'm hopeful that they'll give him a run with the title, but I don't think it'll happen here.This should be a great match though, and a very interesting contrast of styles. I don't think Neville will be utilizing a lot of high flying moves, since that's more of a babyface thing. Instead, I think this match will be more mat-based. Gallagher starts making a comeback near the end, and just as it looks like he's about to set up for the corner dropkick, Austin Aries rushes to the ring and attacks Neville, causing a disqualification. Gallagher takes exception to this, and he and Aries brawl, as Neville walks back up the ramp with a smirk on his face.

[Samoa Joe is shown leaving an office, with Triple H's nameplate on the door, as Charlie tries to get an interview with him]

Charlie: Excuse me, Joe. I know you're getting ready for your match with Sami Zayn, but I just have to ask your reaction to people saying that you're doing Triple H's bidding for him?

Joe: You know, it's funny, I don't see any strings attached to my back, do you? I'm nobody's puppet. Triple H and I simply have an understanding. I attacked Seth Rollins, not because Hunter told me to. I attacked Seth Rollins to make a name for myself, and make a name for myself I did. As far as Sami Zayn goes, he's become a problem. Tonight, I'm gonna get rid of that problem by erasing it. And that is gonna be his problem.

Samoa Joe vs. Sami Zayn
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It really sucks that Seth Rollins got injured, as I think a Joe vs. Rollins match would be on a much higher scale. But regardless, this should still be a fantastic match, and it's one of the matches on this card that I'm most looking forward to. I think Zayn has pretty good matches in general, but I find that his best matches are with much larger opponents. The only thing I don't like about this match is that it's kind of predictable. I don't think anybody expects Zayn to win, as Joe is the bigger priority at this point. It'll be interesting to see what the plan is for either of these guys at 'Mania. I'll predict Joe gets a clean win with that Rock Bottom looking move he executed on Raw this week, as I don't think they want him doing Muscle Busters anymore.

After the match, Joe continues to do a number on Zayn. Officials try to stop him, but to no avail. This leads to Finn Balor making his return, and chasing Joe off. 

[They show Roman Reigns and Braun Strowman on separate screens backstage, preparing for their match in their individual ways]

Bayley vs. Charlotte for the Raw Women's Championship
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This is another one that should be a decent match, but is hindered by the fact that we all know what's expected to happen here. I don't think they're going to end Charlotte's pay per view winning streak on a B-level show, and especially in a challenging role. I think it would feel much more important to end the streak on a bigger show, and have her lose a title. I'm going to predict the same finish that I predicted at The Rumble, which didn't end up happening. Bayley starts building some momentum near the end of the match, and hits a Bayley-to-belly off the top rope, but she is unable to capitalize, as she tweaks her knee on the landing. This allows Charlotte to attack the knee, and hit the Natural Selection, leading into the Figure-8 for the tap-out victory, and Charlotte becomes a five-time champion within one year. I really think they're trying to have her duplicate or surpass her father's title reigns in the women's division. 

​Roman Reigns vs. Braun Strowman
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I can't believe I'm about to admit this, but Strowman has improved drastically in the last several months. I thought he looked very impressive in the rumble match, he had a decent match with Big Show a couple of weeks ago, and I genuinely enjoyed the brawl that these two had on Raw this past week. I only wish that some sort of no holds barred stipulation was added to this match, as I think it would benefit both of these guys. Despite Strowman being this monster character, I think the priority is to make Reigns looks strong for the Taker match. I don't think this will be a squash, as I believe the main event might be, but I think Reigns will win this one in impressive fashion after three superman punches and a spear. 

After being pinned, Strowman impressively gets up almost instantly, looks back to the ring and mouths to Reigns that 'I've got your number!' This leads to a last man standing match between these two on Raw in a couple of weeks, which is when Taker finally makes his return and challenges Reigns.

[The pay per view panel provide their thoughts on the night, and predictions for the main event]

Kevin Owens vs. Goldberg for the Universal Championship
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While I can understand that they need to keep Goldberg strong, and that a longer match would do him no favours, I hope and pray that this is not going to be a squash, but I fear that it might be. Before the match begins, Owens starts taunting Goldberg and trying to play mind games. As they're about to lock up, the lights go out, and there is a jacket that is lit up in the audience, with the person wearing it doing the break the walls down pose. The lights come back on, and Owens is distracted, as he's trying to look for Chris Jericho in the crowd. He turns around and walks right into a spear, followed by a jackhammer, and we have a new Universal Champion in Bill Goldberg. At least by doing it this way, it makes sense that Owens would be thrown off his game, and then squashed by Goldberg, instead of doing this with no distractions.

So there you have it.

Here are my match predictions for WrestleMania:

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar for the Universal Championship

Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship - 
I hate everything about this feud, and I guess after the angle this past week, we aren't getting a triple threat with Harper thrown in there, which would at least make more sense.

Seth Rollins vs. Triple H - Even though it was made official this past week, I kind of still have my doubts that it will happen.

AJ Styles vs. Shane McMahon in a street fight - And there's only ONE WORD TO DESCRIBE THIS: Ugh!

John Cena and Nikki Bella vs. The Miz and Maryse - If Miz and Maryse win, Daniel Bryan is fired as general manager, but if Cena and Nikki win, Maryse is traded to Raw, and the power couple is separated. Despite the fact that this is such a nothing match for Cena, I really liked the promos this week from both guys, so hopefully they keep going with those.

Roman Reigns vs. The Undertaker

Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks vs. Bayley vs. Nia Jax in a fatal four-way match for the Raw Women's Championship

Kevin Owens vs. Chris Jericho - 
Jericho will likely lose the U.S. Championship before then

Samoa Joe vs. Sami Zayn vs. Finn Balor in a triple threat match for the United States Championship - Joe wins the title from Jericho, after Owens interferes

Neville vs. Jack Gallagher vs. TJ Perkins vs. Rich Swann vs. The Brian Kendrick vs. Akira Tozawa vs. Cedric Alexander vs. Austin Aries in a ladder match for the Cruiserweight Championship

Dean Ambrose vs. Baron Corbin for the Intercontinental Championship - 
Possible kick-off match

Enzo Amore and Big Cass vs. Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson vs. Cesaro and Sheamus in a triple threat match for the Raw Tag Team Championships - Kick-off match

Alexa Bliss vs. Becky Lynch vs. Mickie James vs. Naomi in a fatal four-way match for the Smackdown! Live Women's Championship - Kick-off match

Andre the Giant battle royal - Kick-off match. I strongly doubt that this Big Show vs. Shaq match is happening, as they haven't really teased anything on T.V. You would think that they'd have done a lot more to promote a celebrity match.

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    Blaine van der Griend

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